The Irish got smacked around by Southern Cal in a fashion that would make even Ndamukong Suh feel bad during their first night game in 21 years. It was an affair that resembled the type of beatings administered by Pete Carroll teams during the early part of the 2000’s for the first half, and an affair that turned into the 2011 Irish’s ability to mimic The Three Stooges (and I used to love slapstick) in the second half.

Here’s What I Think:

1.) I think that the fall of Troy (for this year) was severely overstated. This isn’t 2003-2008 USC by any means, but as I’ve said every time I talked about the Trojans, they have enough to play with just about everyone but the very cream of the crop. It starts with Barkley and Woods, but Marquis Lee, and little Curtis McNeal can also play on offense, and the defense has guys like Nick Perry and T.J. McDonald. I know Mike Mayock is a respected talent evaluator (who thought the Irish had superior talent), but USC certainly didn’t take a backseat to the Irish as far as “the eyeball test”. If anything, their defense seemed to fly around far better than ND’s.

2.) I think the old adage, “speed kills” rang as true as ever on the eve of the 22nd. The new lingo is “take the top off the defense”, but it’s the same thing. Bob Diaco, a “bend but don’t break” coordinator in the first place, was so scared of Robert Woods and Co., that Irish defensive backs must have been playing 7-10 yards back. The reason to do that is if you don’t feel you match up athletically. And, because of this, it was an easy day at the office for Matt Barkley. Even when is should have been difficult, it was easy. Remember when he got hit by Aaron Lynch on one play, and the ball popped into the air so high that you could practically hear the fans from Major League shout “It’s too high! Too high? Who gives a shit, it’s gone!”? Still, the pass was completed, because Gary Gray was back far enough to field a punt. Robert Blanton can cover, no other Irish secondary player can, and ND needs a talent upgrade there immediately. Then, if Diaco gives the same kind coverage, even against talented receivers, fire his ass.

3.) I think that, for the first time, I really want to see an increased package for Andrew Hendrix. Tommy Rees doesn’t deserve the vitriol that he seems to stir among Irish fans, in fact, in the right circumstances, he could be good enough to take the Irish to the cusp of the BCS in the future. You can go pretty far as a quarterback with smarts, accuracy, and lightning-quick release. But, it can’t be denied how far the Irish offense has bogged down when playing somewhat athletic defenses. The Matt Barkley vs Tommy Rees aspect (experience and arm talent) played a huge role in this game. Robert Woods outplayed Mike Floyd, and SC was able to run at will in part because of the threat of the deep passing game. That lies with the Trojans’ talented receivers, but also their triggerman. Well, ND has some receivers that can play as well, but they did not have near the impact that Trojan receivers did. This must fall at the feet of Rees not being able to get it to them. BK said as much when talking about missing Floyd on three or four occasions. He had time to throw, so either he wasn’t reading properly, or just couldn’t get the ball there. I’m leaning toward the latter, so it may be time to increase the role of Hendrix, and let him have a chance to open things up against tougher defenses.

4.) I think that ND players need to perform. I know we aren’t supposed to call out 18-22 year-olds, and everything is the coach’s fault, but, at some point, players make plays. They don’t fumble snaps that are returned 99 yards, they don’t forget to cover a possible lateral, they don’t garner personal fouls when the defense is going to get off the field. They thread the needle, they make one-handed catches, or bowl a defender over to reach the goal line. For all the criticism Kelly is getting for “not having his players ready”, at the end of the day, a coach’s job is to put his players in a position to win. Were the players in that position? Yes. Did they perform? No.

5.) I think I’m gonna be a huge Stanford fan this weekend. If Lane Kiffin can ask David Shaw “What’s your deal?” at game’s end, it will be a good thing.

Paul Hornung, ND’ original “golden boy”, is the namesake for college football’s newest honor: “most versatile player” (a player that can help their team the most in a large variety of ways).

Hornung is one of college football’s all-time greats (think the original Rocket Ismail, plus he could throw, and play defense), the only player special enough to win the Heisman on a losing team, so his name belongs right up there with the Biletnikoffs and Nagurskis.

However, he might have even more fame for the statement “ND must lower admissions to get the black athlete and win”. Technically, he may be right on lowering admissions, he just made the mistake of using the qualifying term “black”. (That’s what we call racial profiling.)

So, occasionally in his honor, the Blarney will bring you Hornung’s Words of Wisdom, or technically true statements that are worded wrong, and perhaps show some prejudice or some kind of political incorrectness.

Paul Hornung’s Words of Wisdom For 9-01-11:

“Texas A&M made it official yesterday, they are leaving the Big-12 for the SEC. More moves to follow (The SEC will have to get up to at least 14 teams). What could it lead to? Super conferences are the meme for college football these days. I don’t think it is a good thing. Super conferences will lead to more regional play, doing away with the excitement of big intersectional games, and they may be the final catalyst to bring about a playoff-which will dilute the most exciting regular season in sports. Greed and money are the names of the game. Too much greed and money. Conference commissioners are going too far, trying to acquire more and more assets to make their respective conferences more valuable/powerful. These are actions that could end up biting them all in the ass. Let me put it this way: When I was a star, I had lots of girls. I mean lots. But, when I got too greedy, I had to make a visit to the ‘ole clinic, and receive a hearty shot of penicillin.”

The Blarney (at one time) thought that Brady Quinn could be an NFL starting quarterback. Not Tom Brady, but at least Matt Hasselbeck. A very solid leader, could throw around the 20 touchdowns/year area, not throw too many picks, and, in general, keep his team in contention. He wasn’t a Swiss Army Knife, but he had plenty of tools; height to stand tall in the pocket; strength to shake off would-be tacklers; smarts; an arm enough to make all the throws, above-average accuracy; and he was schooled in quarterback know-how by a quarterback guru. I mean, Quinn put up staggering numbers under Weis (64% completion percentage, 35-plus touchdowns/year, close to 4,000 yards/year, and single-digit interceptions). He was even good enough to fool everybody into thinking that Weis was the “chosen one” to put ND on top again. Looking back, do you realize how hard that was to do? That’s like making a 4th grader think that brussel sprouts are as tasty a treat as an ice cream sundae with extra fudge.

However, as soon as he left Notre Dame, the good times ended. He didn’t show enough to get on the field. For the Browns. He couldn’t beat out Derek Anderson. Derek Anderson, who threw such bad interceptions Brett Favre would have been left shaking his head had he seen them. Imagine Favre having to ask this sentence: “Why didn’t he check down?!” Then, Cleveland shipped him to Denver, he couldn’t beat out Kyle Orton (who is probably a top 15 quarterback), which was fine, but then they drafted Tebow. All indications were that Quinn would be third-string behind both of them. At this point, we’re not talking “bust”. Tim Couch was a “bust”. Jeff George was a “bust”. We’re talking “Ryan Leaf-level bust”. Like stuck in a mental institution from the trauma of a failed career, carving “Peyton Manning couldn’t hold my jock strop” or “laces out!” into the walls.

However, it didn’t reach that point, because Tebow isn’t ready to be an NFL quarterback, and because (from what I’ve read) Quinn is playing better than he has at any time up to this point. He is still a “bust”, and a career backup, but he’ll get to stay in the NFL, make some scratch as a #2, and avoid being a “Ryan Leaf-level bust”. You know what? That ain’t so bad.

The Bonus:

What thoughts must have been going threw Quinn’s head when he was elevated to #2 over Tebow? (In a moment of complete honesty.)

(Falls to knees, looking up at the heavens, shouting “Yes! Yes! Thank God! Glory be! Thank you for this moment! Dear God yes!” Tears are rolling down his cheek now. He gathers himself.)

“Oh man, I’m just relieved I didn’t lose out to a quarterback whose signature throw is the fullback dive. What an embarrassment that would have been.”

“I would have had to retire on the spot if I lost to a guy whose throwing motion makes him look like he’s avoiding being attacked by a hive of bees.”

“Had Josh been planning to make the jump-pass a staple of his offense? Is that why I got put on the back-burner?”

“This will be okay for Tim, he can play tight end better than I could.”

(Stands up, and starts doing the moonwalk.)