The yearly spanking by USC was administered last night. 38-3. And it could’ve been worse. It was as if Pa let up with his leather belt, and got the last few whacks in with his bare hand instead. The Domers still can’t sit down yet, but should be able to do so tomorrow.

The Good
The USC song girls have some hotness about them. If the CW network has a show searching for the next Pussy Cat Doll, they could certainly do one for the Song Girls. It’d be on my DVR.

The Bad
I watched the game at BW3’s and looking at the Song Girls caused me to drop some barbecue sauce on my jeans. It was terrible.

The Ugly
The worst I have ever seen the Irish offense look. No first downs until the end of the 3rd, and under 100 yards of total offense. There is a distinct possibility that Weis went the Pete Rose route and bet that the Irish wouldn’t beat the spread.

Jimmy Clausen throwing the ball into the ground (again and again) kinda reminded me of a dog marking his territory.

Flowers and Candy sent to the ND offensive line by the Trojan defenders. Just to say “thank you” for all of the easy hits and yardage lost.

Where’s the Skill? Wendy’s asked Where’s the beef? in the 80’s. Substitute one word for another, and the question can be asked of the Irish today. Notre Dame is light years away from being a contender.

Can anyone help Notre Dame? Weis has worked hard to restore Note Dame and it looks like he has failed. Does he get another chance, or does somebody else get a shot? Does it matter who?

Words have meaning, they are symbols, and a part of who we are and how we communicate. So, if someone calls you a big fat-ass, it’s gonna hurt your feelings. Fat-ass has a meaning-and not a good one.

While this is true, it is also true that actions speak louder than words. Early 90’s soft rockers Extreme said it right in their definitive power ballad-More Than Words (served up on over 20 million neighborhood bar jukeboxes by jilted lovers since ‘91). The point is, doing it means much more than saying it.

Perhaps this truth has hurt Charlie Weis more than anything else. 6 words that he boasted back in 2004 that have not come to fruition on the field.

Decided Schematic Advantage. This phrase is the holy grail to sports writers everywhere. You hear about this anytime they talk about Weis. It is always fodder for the cannon, and a writer could probably make a career just re-hatching and commenting on that claim over and over (as long as Weis coaches). How lucky are they that Weis said this? It is equivalent to buying a house and finding oil underneath.

Tough, Intelligent, Nasty. What Weis said his football teams would be.

These words have not been backed up by actions. Weis offenses have been predictable more than once (though I have often defended him by saying that plays were there, but the players didn’t make them). The Nasty quote is even more damning, as Weis-coached teams have never been particularly tough, and are often man-handled in the trenches.

This is why Charlie is where he is. Strong words and soft actions. Maybe he regrets what he said, maybe he doesn’t. Maybe he has tried to pound toughness into his players-and they simply do not have the physical ability to carry it out on the field. Who knows. But whenever he has the time to contemplate his situation, I bet the guys from Extreme have some sound advice.

Jason Whitlock is a Notre Dame basher. Thank you, Jason Whitlock. Notre Dame in general, and Charlie Weis in particular. If he can write something bad about either, he will. Thank you, Jason Whitlock. Love your PR. You are the poster child for anti-Irish banter, and proof why Notre Dame is THE institution as far as college football is concerned. Notre Dame is simply more interesting and entertaining than any other college football program. Even though you hate the Irish, you still want to talk about them, because Notre Dame draws the attention of the public. Even though the school has been largely irrelevant on the field for more than a decade, you still feel the need to shout it out to the nation. Again, thank you for the PR.

There is no such thing as bad PR. Britney Spears can flash her vagina-(Explicit link!) to paparazzi any day of the week (not her proudest moment), and it helps her career! “Here, I’ll give you a peek at my junk, ‘cuz that adds about $10mil to my annual income.” R. Kelly pee’d on a underage girl-and his album still went to number 1! The people who called Howard Stern detestable were the reason that he had the most popular radio show on the planet. Talking about (a soon to be 6-6) Notre Dame more than a BCS contending Trojan team reinforces the fact that the Irish are what matters nationally.

Whitlock is just a figurehead. There are others. Pat Forde, Michael Wilbon, Teddy Greenstein, etc. All of them are great. Guys like that fuel Notre Dame as a product, even when the flaws make it unsafe to purchase. So go ahead gentleman, pass along your hatred toward this “arrogant” institution. Call Notre Dame “racist”. Call Notre Dame “greedy”. Call Notre Dame “over-privileged.” Because the emotion that these charges bring will be forgotten. (Can’t stay mad forever, unless you’re a woman.) The negative attributes that you give Notre Dame will fade, but its name will resonate within the minds of the public long after your writing days are done. Of course, you recognize that Notre Dame has name value-which is why the bad-mouthing is so profitable in the first place.

Whatever your reasons, Thank you, Jason Whitlock. Thank You, Notre Dame bashers everywhere.