Greg Paulus is a pretty good athlete.

Good enough to garner attention from many major programs in both football (the Irish wanted him), and basketball (everyone wanted him) while enjoying a king’s career at Christian Brother’s Academy in New York.

Good enough to be a 4-year starting point guard at Duke (but let’s be honest, this isn’t 90’s era Duke, this is a Duke era where Christian Laettner-in his 40’s-would make the rest of the Duke athletes look like they belong in the concession stands serving giant-sized soft pretzels).

Good enough to quit playing football for those 4 years, and returning from that hiatus to become the starting quarterback at Syracuse this past year (but let’s be honest, the talent it takes to win the Syracuse quarterback starting job is roughly equal to the acting ability it takes to star in porn).

Recently on Dan Patrick’s radio show, the host pretty much got Paulus to say (admittedly, only after much badgering from Patrick) that he thinks he would be a better draft pick than Jimmy Clausen, or just about anybody else entering the draft (Sam Bradford was the only quarterback he couldn’t be nudged into saying he would be a better pick than).

Hey, I’m all for believing in yourself. So are guys like Brian Tracy, Napoleon Hill, and Zig Ziglar.

However, Paulus just happens to be a little off in his own self-assessment. (Again, he was only a small, weak-armed, sorta-accurate quarterback, that only could get a starting gig at the Chernobyl of college football programs.)

How Off?

-Off like Ben Roethlisberger is off on judging whether women want to have sex with him.

-Off like going to Ruby Tuesday for a healthy meal. (They have veggie burgers that are the equivalent of eating 2 McDonald’s double cheeseburgers!)

-Off like a boss “tickling” his staff members. Of the same sex. Multiple times. (Sorry, the only thing acceptable touching is giving a firm, open-palmed strike to the buttocks, and even that has to be in the locker room-and only there.)

-Off like introducing a new curling iron into a foreign country, where the name for the product is translated as “manure stick”.

That about sums it up for Grep Paulus’s thoughts. Have some fun, and add some more “off like this” scenarios for your own enjoyment.

Spring practice is under way for quite a few schools, so forecasters have no choice but to trot out “Top College Football Player” lists for 2010. ESPN reporter Joe Schad has his top 100-names that we already know, or are sure to know as next season gets going.

His list includes a few Domers, Michael Floyd at #12, Manti Te’o at #32, Dayne Crist at #47, and Kyle Rudolph at #92.

Schad is correct on those names of course, but (for you super fans) there is a more complete list of Irish players to watch. We’ve already seen the first names on the list, and here comes part II.

Here we go (again).

Ethan Johnson, DE/DT. The Irish haven’t had a star defensive lineman since people churned out their word documents on typewriters. Great teams have great line play on on offense and defense. Great teams have defensive tackles that gobble up running backs like an IHOP breakfast. Johnson has shown flashes in two years, but Notre Dame needs him to be great if the team is to take the next step.

Harrison Smith, S. The man that chases ball carriers like Pepe Le Pew chases the ladies (as in-he never catches them). Smith has been uncomfortable to watch in the defensive backfield, letting receivers run open and free far too often. He has bounced back and forth between safety and linebacker to find his niche, but Brian Kelly has decided that safety is where he needs to be. He has athleticism, but has not proven he can translate that to the field. The Irish don’t have a lot of other options here, so Smith needs to be far better than he ever has been.

Shaquelle Evans, WR. Wide receivers are needed in abundance to make Kelly’s offense fly. Evans is supposed to have a Golden Tate-type of skill set, which could help. A lot.

Theo Riddick, RB. Look we know that Robert Hughes is a bruiser that can pick up some tough yards. We know that Armando Allen is a quick, duel-threat that can rip off a twenty yard gain, and catch out of the backfield. However, Riddick can be a difference-maker. He has the vision, speed, and moves that a ball carrier needs to be a big-play threat. He could be to this offense what Ben Roethlisberger is to lawyers who specialize in harassment cases.

Matt Romine, T or Matt James, T. Romine is a fourth-year player that was once one of the most highly regarded high school offensive lineman in the country. He has not made a mark yet. Matt James will be a true freshman that was on of the most highly-regarded high school offensive lineman in the country. He has a chance to make his mark. Notre Dame quarterbacks haven’t had tackles that can handle elite rushers (other than Ryan Harris) in years, so these two need to reverse the trend, and ensure that the Irish support staff doesn’t need to know whether Tide or Cheer gets the stains out of Dayne Crist’s shirts better.

Spring practice is under way for quite a few schools, so forecasters have no choice but to trot out “Top College Football Player” lists for 2010. ESPN reporter Joe Schad has his top 100-names that we already know, or are sure to know as next season gets going.

His list includes a few Domers, Michael Floyd at #12, Manti Te’o at #32, Dayne Crist at #47, and Kyle Rudolph at #92.

Schad is correct on those names of course, but (for you super fans) here is a more complete list of Irish players to watch (in the correct order)…

Here we go.

Dayne Crist, QB. He is lower on Schad’s list because ole’ Joe took the easy way out and selected guys that have already broken out for his top spots (You mean that returning Heisman-winner Mark Ingram is a “player to watch”? I would never have thought that!). However, Crist is the most important player on Notre Dame’s roster. A former 5-star recruit with all the makings of a stud, Dayne has the tools to help Brian Kelly’s offense put on 40 point shows as often as Lady Gaga scares small children with her fashion choices. If he recovers from injury, and picks up the offense, Notre Dame will surprise. If he can’t, this season will have all the makings of a Charlie Weis record (6-6).

Michael Floyd, WR. Legitimate claim to college football’s best receiver along with Julio Jones and A.J. Green. If the Irish are indeed an explosive offense, this guy will be a huge reason why.

Kyle Rudolph, TE. 1st-year starting qb. New offense. Can we say a tight end is a young quarterback’s best friend? When in doubt, he will make like Dwight Howard, and post up a linebacker to get open for an easy completion.

Manti Te’o, LB. We saw flashes of explosiveness, and Mike Tyson-like hitting power from the freshman phenom last year. The guy looks like he belongs on an SEC defense, and will need to keep building on his freshman year to become the truly fearsome defender that the Irish desperately need.

Robert Blanton, CB. Blanton as a freshman was like Tommy Lee Jones in “The Fugitive”.

Opposing WR: “I’m not gonna catch that ball, you don’t have to cover me.”
Blanton: “I don’t care. I’m gonna keep you covered anyway.”

Blanton as a sophomore?

He stumbled on the field like Ozzy Osbourne would stumble in a Spelling Bee.

A return to the Blanton of old would mean good things for Notre Dame.

Darrin Walls, CB. Recycling is a big thing, so you can pretty much just recycle the comments about Blanton, and use them for Walls. Just substitute the “freshman” and “sophomore” years for Blanton with “Sophomore” and “Senior” years for Walls. Oh, and throw in a “year’s exile” somewhere in there.

Darius Fleming, LB/DE. Perhaps the only other Irish front 7 player that can bring the type of athleticism to the table that Te’o does. Just not enough production. If Fleming can put it together, he could have a double-digit sack season for the Irish defense. If he can do that, opposing quarterbacks might not find it more enjoyable to play the Irish defense than it is spending a day at Disney World.

Those are the guys that make the first cut, the ones that have the most say in the success that the Irish will or will not see this season. Look for the second part of this list coming up.